


your queen sized bed

by astrocos (Piercy_wearcy)



Category: Cow Chop, The Creatures (Youtube RPF)
Genre: Angst, Awkward Boners, Cuddling, Dinner, Falling In Love, First Dates, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Moving In Together, New Relationship, NovaHD - Freeform, Pillow Talk, Skinny Dipping, Song fics, a bunch of awkward advances, aleks and eddie work together it's great, awkward stories, buckle up friends, complete dorks, failed dinner plans, it's going to be a long ride, no office AU, seamus is still there
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-07
Updated: 2016-06-26
Packaged: 2018-05-25 05:45:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6182800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Piercy_wearcy/pseuds/astrocos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James takes a chance on leaving his number on a cute customers receipt, Aleks takes a chance by texting a number written on his receipt by the hot Game Stop employee</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. deer in the headlights

Sunday nights at 4pm, the only time Aleks could muster up the strength after work to go out. Most Sundays it was the game stop closest to his apartment, a short 10 minute bike ride greeted by an always empty bike rack in the small strip malls parking lot.

I walk in, nod at the man behind the counter and go straight to the new releases only half aware of the idle chit chat from the workers as I scan over the clearance rack

“No way horedon” one says harshly to the other

‘I have no interest in talking to any of them, I just need something to cure my boredom at night’ I tell myself as I slowly drift towards the newer releases, debating whether or not it was worth waiting a few months for the discounts to start.

“The new Far cry game is great” a cheery voice interjects my thoughts, stopping me in my tracks

“Really?” I ask pulling the game off the shelf to examine its case, avoiding eye contact

“If you’re into open world type games” the he says again, leaning in to point at something on the back of the case mumbling about the games run time. As he gets closer, the scent of musky cologne is intoxicating and I can feel my body tense up. My eyes follow up the finger that leads to a tattooed arm and up at the man. Warm brown eyes look into mine followed by a radiant smile, I quickly look back down at the Far Cry case pretending that it holds much more interest than it truly does. Heat burning the tips of my ears as he looks at me smiling, I glance up again quick enough to read his name tag. James, it says in block letters printed off onto a sticker and placed over the name of the last employee to use it.

“I’ll take it” I say standing up a bit straighter, smacking the case into my open palm as I shuffle over to the front counter. Placing the game down carefully reaching into my back pocket for my wallet as James moves behind the counter to start ringing me in.

“That’ll be 45 dollars an 65 cents please” he says grabbing the case off the counter and placing the game in it carefully wilts giving me the rundown of their return policy. I nod along as I hand him the right amount of cash accepting my change and grabbing my bag trying to get out as soon as possible. I flash a quick smile and turn to leave, catching a snippet of hushed conversation

“I told you he’d blush” Pushing the stores doors open and rushing to the bike rack I quickly unlock my bike, placing the bag onto the handle bars I speed away.

‘No possible way they were taking about me’ I think to myself as heat flushes my cheeks, contrasting against the harsh cold wind hitting my face. Probably about some other customer.

\-------

 

\-------

I unlock the front door to my apartment, pushing it open I sigh at the familiar smells of my own place. Placing my backpack down and kicking my shoes onto the rack I pull the new game out of the bag and place it on the counter.

‘Why would two guys at a game stop talk about me’ I wonder grabbing the receipt out of the bag placing it over top of the game case and throwing out the colored bag ‘or wedge their bets on whether or not I’d blush’ Blue pen marks on the black and white paper catch my eye as I walk past the counter to get to my living room, a large circle is scribbled at the bottom of the receipt followed by a series of numbers and a winking smiley face. Subtle. I examine the paper further to see that the circle encases a 10 percent friends and family discount, scoffing I open the case up and tuck the receipt into the instruction manual slot.

I’ve tried to hit on many woman, and men, in my short amount of time but none have gotten past the idle polite texts or even the chit chat. And here comes along a dark haired tanned skin man who can say two words to me and have the bravery to give me a discount and his number.

I walk towards my living room pulling my phone out of my pocket and into my hand, I sit for a few minutes scrolling through twitter not really comprehending the short phrases celebrities have sent out to the world. I snap out of it as my ringer chimes along with a banner popping up at the top of my screen, a new message.

 **Eddie:** What’s up man?

You: pretty good man, guy at Game Stop gave me a discount and his number today. What about you?

 **Eddie** : HOLY SHIT DUDE DID YOU TEXT HIM YET?????

My eyes widen as the all cap text on my screen turns into an incoming call from Eddie, I answer the call and place it to my ear, regretting my decision instantly.

“DUDE, was he cute?” Eddie asks quickly ignoring the formality of a hello or hey

“I guess yeah” I say brining the phone right against my ear “I didn’t really stop to stare at him, I just kind of bought my game and left”

“Well I think you should text him” says Eddie excitedly “Remember the last time you tried to give a guy your number?”

“Yeah” I sigh thinking back to the last time Eddie pulled me out to a gay bar, the man smiled politely as I wrote it on a napkin and I watched him walk away as he promptly threw it into the nearest trashcan “Not my fault he was an asshole”

“Not the point Aleks” Eddie practically wines “it’s not every day a possibly cute stranger gives you his number, AND a discount”

“Fair enough” I mumble. We sat in silence for a few seconds, my mind running a mile a minute. “Well” says Eddie breaking the silence, before hanging up he says “go get him tiger” followed by three beeps from my hone confirming that the call ended.

I stand up and circle back round to the kitchen glaring down at the me case, quickly I open it and pull out the receipt before I start to second guess myself. Opening my phone and click add new contact

*new contact saved: James (Game stop)*  


You: hi

 **James (game Stop):** hey

You: how’s it going?

 **James (Game Stop):** good, and you?

You: great thanks

A minute passes as I sit on the edge of a bar stool staring at my phone screen, my leg bounces uncontrollably anxiously awaiting an answer.

 **James (Game Stop):** Who is this?

I mumble angrily to myself, should have started with a “hey I’m the guy you hit on at work and put your number on my receipt, names Aleks” not just a simple ‘hi’

You: Aleks, the guy you gave your number to today  
You: sorry I should have introduced myself first

 **James (Game Stop):** oh hey man, I didn’t expect a message so soon James (Game Stop): or one at all really

You: you give your number out a lot?

 **James (Game Stop):** Not really no

You: oh

‘Way to go Aleks, end the conversation quickly’ I mentally kick myself clicking my phone off and placing it back in my phone pocket, I pull myself up sluggishly tired from today’s events. Moving up the stair to my room proved to be a challenge as I trip over the last step up. Entering my room I go to riffle through my closet, gabbing out a pair of sweats a shirt and new pair of boxers I walk to the connected bathroom. Stripping down to nothing I bend down to grab my phone out of my pants pocket, no message yet, I place my music onto shuffle and get into the shower. My mind wanders as the water runs down my body. ‘Did he give me his number as a joke? Was this some kind of sick bet between coworkers?’ I go through my shower routine absentmindedly, stepping out of the shower and into the chilly air stops me in my tracks.

I reach over to grab my towel off its rack and start to dry myself off, pulling the soft fabric over my chilled body I grab my phone off the sink and walk out of the room. Making a direct line to the doorway of my room I shut off the light I crawl under the thick comforter of my bed and sigh. As the blankets began to warm around me I feel a light buzz through my sweat pants

*new message: James (Game Stop)*  


My heart races as I unlock my phone, the screen too bright for the dark room it takes a few seconds for my eyes to adjust enough to read the text.

 **James (Game Stop):** so what kind of games are you into?

\------

\------

Three hours and a few light doses later I now know a lot more about James other than that he works at a video game store, he owns a corgi named Ein, moved to Colorado two years back for school, he wants to become a concept artist for a big name video company, he only work evenings, he has a good amount of friends from around the city and he’s gay.

Our conversation slows down as the time between texts increase, I notice that my phone battery is running low as I check the time at the top of the screen, 4:18am. I shoot James a quick goodnight text and plug in my phone, I lay back down my eyes burning from the hours of staring at our virtual conversation. I sink down into my bed letting all that had happened that day flood through my mind as I drift out of consciousness smiling.

\-----

\-----

As the morning drifts past I slowly open my eyes to be greeted by a softly lit room, I slowly bring my hand up to rub my face as my dreams slip out of memory. I sigh as I sit up reaching over to the night stand to grab my phone, I smile as I read the notification.

*3 new messages: James (Game Stop)*

I unlock my phone and glance over the new texts

 **James (Game Stop):** G’night  
**James (Game Stop):** good morning :)  
**James (Game Stop** ): would you like to go see a movie this weekend?


	2. Chinese New Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm looking at the cosmos, hoping that we get along

[chinese new year](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gykWYPrArbY)

\----

I bounce from foot to foot on the doorstep of my apartment complex pulling my sweater tighter around my torso, it check my watch again for the third time in the last 5 minutes, and James was supposed to be here already. We had been chatting for the past week waiting for our official date, most nights ended in an almost dead phone and a happy feeling but tonight it was going to end face to face. I perk up as I see a blue car slowly round the corner driving slower than normal, my suspicions are confirmed as it stops in front of me and I can see James waving from the driver’s side. I wave back and walk quickly to the vehicle, opening up the door I sit slowly folding my hands in my lap.

“Sorry for being late” James apologizes as he turns the car around and back towards the way he came.

“It’s okay” I say unable to pull my eyes away from my lap, I quickly glance up at him, his dark curly hair cut short and glasses perched on his nose. I don’t remember them being there before but I shrug to myself, I can see his head turn towards me out of the corner of my eye. James laughs to himself quietly, he and I sit in comfortable silence for the short distance to the theatre with the radio on low to fill the dead air. Finally we turn into the packed parking lot for the midnight screening of the new Exodus movie and I try to stifle laughter as James curses at all the taken parking spaces. Finally we park slowly getting out of the vehicle

“Excited?” James asks me over the top of his car, locking the doors and bringing his hand up to scratch at his short beard.

“Of course” I say looking up from the car door to James, he’s smiling like a fool at me “I get to be with you in person and not just through a screen” I blush at the sudden realization of what I said, chuckling lightly as my hand covers my mouth

“Romantic” he says stepping in front of the car and around to my side. I smile as he places his arm over my shoulder, we start towards the front doors of the theater chatting about expectations for the movie. I look up at him and our eyes meet, red flushes the apples of his cheeks as he smiles back at me.

\-------

I groan as I stand up from the padded seats of the theater clasping my hands together and drawing them back over my head earning a satisfying pop from my shoulder. I look over to see James, I grab my garbage out of the seat and follow James out of the room throwing out the bag.

James leans into me as we walk back out of the theatre doors

“That movie was shit” he whispers to me, I lean back as I laugh at his statement

“The movie was pretty shit” I agree as the cold wet night air hits me, I shiver and start to walk faster bringing my hands to my arms. I jump slightly as I feel fabric up against my neck, I smile slightly as I see James placing his sweater around my shoulders. I look down at the grey soft fabric wrapped round me laughing lightly at the checkered pattern across the chest

“What?” James asks looking over at me

“Is this sweater by chance your grandfathers?” I ask smirking at him

“You didn’t seem to have a problem when I was wearing it” he says reaching into his pocket pulling out his car keys, clicking a button on the fob causing a honk from his nearby car. As we get closer to the car James jogs ahead and opens up the passenger side door

“Thank you” I say stepping into the car sitting down on the seat, the door closing beside me. I chuckle at James as he walks in front of the car to his side climbing in beside me

“Who said chivalry is dead” he says laughing along with me, we both settle down slowly staring out the water speckled windshield. The street lamps glow skewed across the water slayed across the ground, I glance up further into the dark night sky trying to make out constellations beyond the glow of the city.

“Did you know” I start, my eyes never breaking from the inky black in front of me “That the galaxy of Andromeda was named after the princess Andromeda the wife of the Greek hero Perseus”

James shifts in his seat his eyes gazing at me like I was at the stars

“She was found by Perseus while chained to a rock about to be eaten by a sea monster” I know the story off by heart, one that I’ve read and re-read a million times “He fell in love instantly, defeating the monster Cetus and leading them to her father Cepheus to ask for her hand in marriage”

I turn to face James, his eyes alight with such copious amounts curiosity

“I know you want to become a chemist but I never would have guessed you knew so much about mythology” he says eyes smiling down at me, I blush furiously bringing my hand to my face

“I love everything about space to be honest” I say running my hands through my hair “I even have Sputnik tattooed onto my arm” I state motioning to the sleeve on my right arm, James smiles looking down at my arm despite being covered in three layers of fabric

“Would you maybe want to continue this?” James asks facing back to the steering wheel, turning his keys and starting the ignition “I mean, do you want to get something to eat?”

“That’d be nice” I say pulling my seatbelt across my chest, buckling it into its socket

\------

“Are you ready to order or do you need more time?” our waitress asks holding her pen and paper n hand

“I’ll have the bacon cheese burger with fries please” James says folding his menu and handing it to the waitress, she scribbles the order down quickly and shifts her focus to me.

“And I’ll have the club sandwich with a garden salad please” she nods at me and continues to write on the over used crumpled hand sized flip pad, she takes our drink order and hurries off with a smile.

“Only a sandwich and a salad?” James asks leaning forward so both forearms rest on the table

“I’m not one for heavy eating at four in the morning” I say leaning back in the booth crossing my arms behind my head, eyes starting to grow heavy with sleep

“I’m so glad Denny’s open 24/7” James says rubbing a hand across his face “How else would I prolong a date until 5am”

“I’ve made some pretty good memories at Denny’s late at night” I say thinking back to all the times my friends and I have come to this restaurant chain past 3am in search of food and sleep deprived conversation fuel by caffeine

“You can add this to your list then” James says smiling brightly

\------

“Thanks for tonight” I say as James turns the car pulling up next to the curb of my apartment block, I turn to him and smile as he pulls the gear shift into park “And today” I chuckle the cherry red letters on the dash displaying 6:38am

“Thank you for texting the number I left on your receipt” He says back leaning forward over the consul separating us, my heart leaps at the thought as I lean forward closing the gap. ‘All the clichés in the world had happened on this date so why not top it off with a good night or good morning kiss’ I think to myself as we pull back slowly, I unbuckle my seatbelt and shrug off his sweater laying it in between the seats. I smile once again as I look into his eyes, I get out of the vehicle and shut the door behind me waving back at the car before walking into the lobby.

I stumble to my bedroom stripping down to my underwear as soon as I enter the door shutting it behind me, grabbing a new pair of boxers I change out quickly and collapse onto my bed. Drunk off of new memories, hopes of what tomorrow holds and a lack of sleep making my body heavy pulling me into a deep sleep. I only stir when my phone chimes at 6:53pm with the rapidly setting sun jetting through my blinds painting the wall with deep oranges and reds. I sit up slowly, making my way over to my discarded clothing from this morning pulling my phone out

*3 New Messages from: James (Game Stop)*

I sit back down on my bed and unlock my phone

 **James (Game Stop):** I had fun last night/ this morning, thank you again for going out with me

 **James (Game Stop):** when would you want to go out again?

 **James (Game stop):** That is if you want to go out again, I just assumed the kiss was a dead give away

I smile to myself typing back a quick reply, I click on his profile tapping around for a few second

*Contact changed to ‘James’*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man oh man this chapter is short but sweet and but I'm still indecisive about the point of view (And if they are out of character)


	3. little numbers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> all the pretty things that we could be

[little numbers](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zsyjS_vJfkw)

\----

I sigh as I run the calculations through my head for the thousandth time, James doesn’t go to work until four and he gets off at ten, I work ten till two and have a class at four getting out at eight. That leaves me two hours from now to clean and be at work, two hours to cook and get ready, and a spare hour and a half for shopping in between the two. James and my schedules have already proven to be hard to coordinate, odd hours left all our outings late at night followed by tired days but my god was it worth it.

Laying back down onto my bed I start thinking back to or past dates, the past two months have been filled with shitty movie nights, late night dinners and midday coffee dates at the overpriced coffee shop James loves so much. My phone chimes pulling me out of my thoughts, I swipe it open and read the new text

 **Eddie:** guess who got scheduled for the dining room this morning?

You: you

 **Eddie** : Yeah! Now you can complain to me about your customers without having to come to the bar

You: Lucky me

I click off my phone and nod at the thought of working alongside Eddie this afternoon, serving was only fun when Eddie wasn’t stuck behind the bar counter on the opposite side of the restaurant. I glance over at the clock on my nightstand, texting Eddie and lazing about just shaved of a half an hour from my cleaning time. I pocket my phone standing up, heading down the stairs not bothering to change out of my pajamas. Turning into my kitchen I flick on the light illuminating the dark kitchen, the overcast sky outside providing no light. I start with the dishes, pulling everything out of the sink and placing it onto the counter I run the water until it’s hot enough to barely stand. I set up the dishrack on the side, plug the sink and wait for it to fill leaning my back up against the opposite counter of the small kitchen. Chores aren’t something I enjoy doing but I do enjoy the satisfaction of a clean house, I think to myself for a few seconds looking out the window to my right as rain pelts the window

After the dishes I roam around the small downstairs area picking up bits of trash, fluffing pillows and wiping down ledges and tables, mentally scolding myself for putting off this for so long and letting all this dirt collect. I pull out my phone to see another text from Eddie

 **Eddie** : I’ll be at your place at 9:20 be ready

I shoot back a quick reply and make my way back upstairs to get ready for my seven hour shift in the hell that is known as The Keg.

\----

I shut the door to my apartment behind me, turning the key and locking the door my backpack slung over one shoulder.

“Well don’t you look good today” Eddie jokes as I climb up into the passenger’s seat of his Santa Fey, patting down my jacket to rid it of the water left on me from the short walk

“You’re wearing the exact same thing asshole” I chide buckling myself in looking over at him and his white button up accompanied by a black tie underneath his vibrantly colored rain jacket

“So how’s it going with you and James?” he asks pulling away from the curb and back down the street

“Really good actually” I say shifting in my seat placing my elbow onto the windows ledge “He’s so funny and kind and we get along so well together it’s uncanny”

“Aleksandr’s in love” he jokes, giggling at his clever comment

“I hope so” I say laughing along with him “I need someone else in this shitty world besides you”

“Hey!” Eddies says reaching over to punch me in the arm “I could say the same for myself” we laugh together and settle down after a few seconds we sit in silence for the remainder of the ride to the restaurant

“He’s coming over for dinner tonight after he’s done at work” I say as the car pulls into a staff parking spot behind The Keg

“What are you going to make?” Eddie asks pulling the keys out of the ignition and undoing his seatbelt

“I have no idea honestly” I say following his actions “Maybe I’ll grab two staff meals”

“Gross” Eddies says climbing out of the car motioning for me to get out as well “Just ask Steven for some tips for what to make when he’s on his break” “Ask the cook for tips, cliché” I say stepping out of the vehicle and shutting the door behind me, pulling my backpack farther up my shoulder I head up the steps into the back of the restaurant

“He’s a cook for a reason!” Eddie calls at me from behind

\-------

“God I hate couples” I grumble to myself as I get into Eddies car, they can’t take their eyes off of each other long enough to order their drinks and I’m stuck having to wait politely for them to get their head out of the clouds

“Aren’t you and James technically a couple?” Eddie asks joining me inside the vehicle to escape the rain

“No” I say pulling the seat belt across my chest “Yes, well no” I stumble on my words

‘Are James and I dating?’ I ask myself, we haven’t really made anything official but we’ve gone out a lot. Dos that count as dating?

“Well do you want to date him?” Eddie asks me starting up the car placing his hand behind my headrest and turning his body to see behind the vehicle

“Of course” I say pulling out my phone to check the time, 4:15 and a new message from James. My stomach jumps when I see his text

James: I’m really excited for tonight, but I’m going to be a bit late if that’s okay, gotta get ready and take care of Ein before I head over xx

You: of course that’s fine asshole, leaves me more time to panic

“ALEKS” Eddie yells napping my attention back to him

“What the fuck dude!” I yell back sitting back up in my chair

“I was taking to you and I look over and you’re staring at your phone with a dopey look on your face” he says exasperatedly

“Sorry man” I say placing my phone into my jacket pocket “was testing James”

“Of course” Eddie chuckles “need to go anywhere before your apartment?”

“Yeah” I say “Walmart please”

\------

Eddie drops me off in front of Walmart with a wave after drilling me with questions about making my way home

“You’re going to take the bus home with dress pants on and bags full of groceries?”

I walk in the front door greeted by one of the employees and recieve a flyer, I nod as I accept the flyer full of deals and decide on a basket instead of a cart today. I weave between the isles slowly looking for everything needed for spaghetti, Steven laughed when I asked him what to make for a dinner date but wrote down the recipe and vague instructions for me none the less.

I check my watch as I browse through the extensive vitamin isle looking for my regular one a day supplements, I eat like a starving college student because I am one, twenty minutes to make it to the bus stop down the road. I grab the blue bottle of Flintstone gummies off the shelf and toss it in my basket, as I continue down the aisle the Planned Parenthood sign catches my eye

‘Do I even have condoms at the house?’ I ask myself glancing through the extensive variety of protection ‘better safe than sorry’ I shrug grabbing my usual brand of condoms and placing them in the basket underneath a few things followed by a small bottle of lube

With everything I needed in the basket with a few extras I make my to the checkout line with the least amount of people, I earn a couple of weird looks from the people around me. I look down at myself to see my tie poking out from in between my navy blue jacket flaps, I cough lightly blushing as I zip up my jacket completely.

The line goes by quickly and I load my items onto the conveyer belt, smiling at the worker as she greets me and starts to scan my items

“Having a night in?” she asks scanning the condoms and lube, placing them at the bottom of the bag as not to be seen by anyone else

“I hope” I reply nervously as I fish my wallet out of my backpack, standing awkwardly by the till bracing myself for the total

“Your total will be forty seven fifty two” she says, I shuffle around my wallet a bit pulling out my debit card. The transaction goes smoothly thank the lord and I grab my bag, checking my watch quickly, ten minutes.

I walk out the front doors moving off to the side as not to block anyone and set everything down, opening up my backpack I start to place everything in carefully as to not have anything still in the bags. Succeeding I zip the bag back up and sling it around my shoulder groaning at the weight, I pull my hood up and set out to the bus stop.

\------

Finally making it to my apartment I sigh as I place down the heavy bag on my back, peeling of my jacket, almost completely soaked through despite the puros to repel, I hang it on the back of my door to dry. I shuffle up the stairs to my bedroom, I place my phone down as I discard my work clothes into the laundry hamper replacing them with a pair of dark jeans and a grey sweatshirt. My phone chimes and I reach over to grab it

*New message: Spencer*

 **Spencer:** it’s raining cats and dogs man d’you want a ride?

I type back a quick ‘yes please’ and go back downstairs to put away my groceries

\----

“Thanks again man” I say as I climb into Spencer’s car

“No problem” he says pulling away from the curb “Got anything planned this weekend?” he asks trying to start a conversation

“I got a dinner date tonight” I say buckling in my seatbelt

“Holy shit that beats my twilight princess run through” he laughs “Who’s the lucky girl”  


I freeze at the question, I don’t know Spencer well enough to know if he doesn’t have a shitty opinion on gay people, but he seems like a nice enough guy

“Guy actually” I say hesitantly, looking at his face for any signs of discomfort of disgust. I don’t see any so decide to continue “His names James Wilson”

“Oh I know him” he says sounding excited “My boyfriend Joe has been friends with him since high school”

“Boyfriend?” I ask as if I had not just told him I liked dudes as well

“Yeah” he says looking over at me “I am what us youngsters call a homosexual”

“That was rude I’m so sorry dude” I say trying to back pedal out of the situation, I look at him to see if he was angry but none of his features gave it away if he was

“It’s okay Aleks, I don’t usually tell people” he says “But seeing as you’re going out with a guy I thought it was okay to tell you”

“And it is” I say immediately after he’s done talking “Small world huh?” I say as we turn into the universities parking lot

“It really is” he replies

Class goes by slowly seeming to drag on forever with the thought of what was to come later that night, Spencer dives me home and I turn to him before exiting the car

“thank you again Spencer” I say placing a 10 dollar bill on his lap “For gas” I say ignoring his protest, I grab my bag and shut the door behind me as I walk through the rain up to the building,

\------

Cooking is not my forte, never has and probably never will be, but for James I would try. I managed to have a shower and make myself presentable before all hell broke loose in the kitchen, I quickly move from the sink to the stove cursing at the sauce for splattering over the white stove top, I stir it around quickly and place a lit over the pot. Cooking Stevens “Easy” recipe was starting to be proven harder than I thought, a burned pack of mushrooms, a smoke detector going off and a dirty stove top later with only five minutes left until James was supposed to be here the panic set in. I turn the burner onto low and place a large pot of water beside the sauce turning the element onto high, with the food taken care of for now I move on to the living room. I stand back to look at the layout, no mess, couch cushions are straight, coffee table clear. I step in and grab the wooden coffee table pulling it to the left, I stand back and admire the change with a smile. I jump at the sound of my phone ringer, I quickly walk back to the kitchen to grab my phone reading the new text

 **James:** on my way :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> man this is just exposition ad character introduction for the fic! hope it was interesting enough for a filler


	4. folding chair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> until that day just please don't be so down, don't make frowns you silly clown

[folding chair ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dxvf0WZmg5M)

\-----

I my body hopefully smoothing out any wrinkles made in the process of tidying up as I reach out to open the door.

My heart stops as my eyes meet James, he’s not wearing anything fancy to my request just jeans and a tee shirt but what’s in his hands is was jolts me

“You didn’t have to” I gush as he pushed the white bouquet of daises into my hands, I step back with the door to let him in

“Well this is our first time together at one of our apartments” he says stepping and letting me shut the door behind him “It’s a special occasion”

I just smile back as we make our way into the apartment past the kitchen and into the living room, I set the flowers down on the counter with full intentions to press them in a book once James leaves

“Man it smells great in here” he mentions looking at the photos on the wall and furniture around the room

“Thanks” I say quickly “You can sit, I’ll go get the food”

“No it’s alright let me help you” he insists following me into the small kitchen

“It’s my house I make the rules jerk” I joke pulling the lid off on the sauce stirring it, he laughs at my joke and starts to open every cupboard looking for the plates

“Above the toaster” I say and he turns around facing the right cupboard and opens it up with a triumphant ‘Ah Ha’. He grabs out two plates and sets them down on the counter next to the stove

“Did you make this from scratch?” he asks pointing down at the pot

“Of course” I say placing my hand over my heart, acting offended at the statement “Did you expect it came from a can?”

“No, no I don’t” he says laughing “But when you said Italian, I was expecting Dominoes”

I smile as I place the lid back on the pot, turning away from James I crouch down to grab the uncooked noodles out of my lazy Susan. My stomach drops as I turn it around looking desperately for the spaghetti noodles to no avail, I grab all that’s available and stand back up.

“So, you have three options” I say turning back to James “I have fettuccini noodles, but only enough for one of us” holding up the almost empty pasta box in my left hand to prove my point

“But I also have enough vermicelli for the both of us and then some extra” I continue holding up my right hand to show the large package of rice noodles

“And the third is?” he asks after a few seconds of waiting for my reply

“We drive to the store” I say finally, placing both of the pastas down on the counter beside me and drop my hands to my sides. I know I should have checked the cupboard once I got home but I could have sworn there was a pack left from the last time I had pasta

“Well what do you want to do?” he ask folding his arms over his chest

“You’re the guest” I say turning to shut off the burner under the sauce

“Your house your rules” he says mocking my words from before

“Fine then” I say reaching over for the vermicelli “Rice noodles for spaghetti it is” I say as I tear the new package open and carefully pull the fragile noodles out of their pack. We sit in silence for the few minutes it takes the thin noodles to cook, I break the silence by asking for the plates James sat down a few minutes ago.

“How much do you want?” I ask James as I pull the thin noodles out of the pot with a pair of tongues

“That’s good” he says when I’m done placing the second scoop of noodles onto his plate

We settle down on the barstools against beside each other on the opposite side of the counter from the stove top

“How was your day?” James asks twirling his fork into the pasta on his plate, I smile at such a domestic question

“Busy” I respond smiling over at him “But I found out that one of my class mates Spencer is dating your friend Joe”

James looks up to me in surprise “No kidding” he mumbles around a mouthful, swallowing before he continues “Small world”

“Sure is” I say back before beginning to eat, I admire my cooking before remembering that it was Steven who gave me the recipe

“This is really good” James says motioning to his plate with his fork as if reading my mind

“Thank you” I say twirling another bite onto my fork “A cook in the restaurant I work in gave me the recipe, it’s him to thank”

“Either way it’s great” James says

We finish dinner slowly with conversation extending our time further, we talk about everything from video games to high school to our day. I find myself feeling at ease leaning on the counter in front of me engrossed in conversation, James’ voice lulls me deeper into the calm of the night.

“Are you okay?” he asks snapping me out of my daze

“Yeah I’m fine” I say sitting up rubbing my hands over my face “D’you want to watch a movie or something?” I ask checking my watch, 12:30am

“Unless you have to go home” I catch myself before James can answer

“No it’s okay” he says reaching over to grab my plate as he stands up “I’m in no rush” I smile at his response and stand up alongside him

“You can just put those in the sink” I call over the counter to him, stretching out with a long yawn as I do so

“You know” James says walking back up to me “Maybe I’ll take you camping one day”

I stare at him for a few seconds trying to figure out how his thought process brought him to that conclusion “What?” I ask as I walk over to the couch and siting down on the far side

“Well” James says bashfully laughing at his boldness “my friend Jordan brought me camping up in the mountains once, and I was amazed at how clearly you could see the stars”

“That would be pretty cool” I say leaning back onto the cushions “But what brought you to that?” I ask, watching him as he sits down beside me

“I was looking at your tattoo” he admits, looking down at my sleeve

“I’d enjoy that” I say leaning into him lightly “What do you want to watch?”

\------

The evening winds down when the movie comes to an end and I have trouble keeping my eyes open on James’ shoulder. Somewhere in between picking the movie the mummy and the end credits we ended up leaning against each other with my head cradled in his neck and his arm around my waist

“I should go” James says rubbing my arm

“Why?’ I ask siting up from his embrace

“The Russian prince needs his beauty sleep” he says in a mocking tone, I roll my half open eyes at his corny nickname

“Can’t you just sleep here?” I wine only half aware of the bratty tone in my voice

“I’d love to” he says standing up from the couch extending out one hand to help be up. I reach out to grab it and pull myself up trying not to be too much of a dead weight but I’m cranky when I’m tired

We make our way to my bedroom as I lead still holding his hand, I stop in front of my closed bedroom door, this was the only place I didn’t clean and there is a box of condoms sitting on top of my bed side table. I turn back to look at James, confusion spread on his face at my resistance to open the door

“I didn’t tidy my room before you came over” I say quietly looking up at him

“That’s okay” he tries to assure me, nudging me towards the door behind me. I sigh and turn back round turning the handle pushing open the door to reveal a messy room

“Do you need something to sleep in?” I ask moving towards my bed, opening the top drawer of my night stand I look over my shoulder to see if James is paying attention and fortunately he’s caught up with exploring the room with his eyes. I stuff the box of condoms under a book I had been reading the past few nights and shut the drawer behind me

“pajama pants if you have any” James says glancing over the frames hung on the wall “You have a lot of photos if your family up”

“I really like having the memories so readily available” I say walking over to my closet to look for a pair that would fit James, I find the plaid pair I was searching for and pull them out of their stack “these will work” I say tossing them over to James, he catches them and I turn back around to find my pajamas. It takes the clink of a belt and the rustling of clothing for it to dawn on me what was really happening, I grab a shirt and pajama bottoms and turn back around to see James slip the fabric over his hips.

The calm atmosphere shifts to an awkward silence as I walk over to the laundry hamper in the far corner of the room, my back is to James and I can hear the sigh of the mattress as he sits down on the bed. I quickly take off my pants and shirt tossing them into the basket in front of me, I immediately pull my pants on when I can feel James’ gaze fall on me. I turn to him as I pull my shirt up my arms and over my head, I catch a glimpse of his smile through the neck hole of my shirt and can’t help but smile back.

“Like what you see?” I as jokingly swaying my hips as I walk towards him, planting my feet a foot away from him

“How couldn’t I?” he asks extending his arms out and placing them gingerly on my hips, I blush to the ground as I place my hands over top of his. The warmth of his ands radiate through my hips as he lazily drags his thumb across my shirt, my heart jumps when he drags his hands down and pulls them back up under my shirt. I shift my weight from foot to foot building up the nerve to lean down and kiss, I’m jolted out of my thoughts as he grips me tighter and pulls me forward. I freeze not knowing what to but relax as he places a brief kiss onto my stomach, I sigh releasing the tension in my body I didn’t realize was there. Pulling my hands away from his I cup his face pulling his away from me, I can see confusion in his eyes as I look down on him. I bend down slightly placing my lips on his, he kisses back slowly leaning backwards until we are laying down on the bed.

He smiles against my lips as he rolls me over onto the left side of the bed

“Let’s get some shut eye” he says sitting up beside me, I laugh lightly at his struggle to pull the blankets down past him but a little hurt that it did not go any further “it’s harder than it looks asshole” he sighs exasperatedly

“If you say so” I say sitting up to turn on my bedside lamp, I stand up and walk towards the light switch to turn it off “Are you good?” I ask before I plunge the room into almost pure darkness, watching James struggle with the sheets further answers my question

“Now I’m good” he says after a few seconds of struggle, I flip the switch and walk back over to the bed pulling the corner of the dark comforter down. I shuffle down into the bed and reach over to turn the lamp off, rustling sheets and slow breathing echo through the dark room as the light hearted feeling of the night melds into the time for sleep.

“D’you want to” James starts, disturbing the calm of the room “meet in the middle” he continues awaiting a response from me

“Yeah, sure” I say shifting my body slowly towards the center on the bed, I can feel James getting closer to me as the mattress caves in the middle drawing us close very quickly

“Why is your bed so big?” he asks as we shuffle around trying to get comfortable

“I move a lot in my sleep” I say, James ends up on his back and I place my head onto his chest curling up to his side “So I sleep in the middle”

“You have a giant ass bed so you don’t fall of?” James laughs

“It’s only a queen” I say smacking my hand on his chest, slowing down his laughing fit

“My bad” he says settling his right arm around my shoulder, rubbing my back

My breathing evens out as I listen to the steady rhythm of James’ heart, my eyes close finally giving into sleep

“Goodnight Aleksandr” James says and I can feel his words rumble through his chest

“Good night” I mumble back

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really like the end part of the chapter and I promise all the goopy stuff happens next chapter. I'm also thinking of adding a side story to this series or timeline so I can keep this plot but have all their little cute moments stashed away on the side bar for your enjoyment. I am in great need for a good title for the series not just this fic so if you have ay ideas or suggestions could you comment them my thirsty ass needs help


	5. The Idea of Growung Old

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> you turn me on to the idea of growing old

[the idea of growig old](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RLmxxfyKhrQ)

\---

“Today marks a momentous occasion” James says lifting his glass up off the dark wood table, I raise my eyebrows and nod unsurely.

James and I had been officially going out for four months now, ever since our first movie date that lasted until 6am up until right now, both of us dressed semi-casual in the middle of a restaurant talking over dinner.

“This marks the day we first went out” he says motioning his glass towards me “I’m sorry I couldn’t take you out to somewhere nicer”

“James” I say cutting off the last bit of his sentence, a disapproving tone making its way through my words “We could be at McDonalds for all I care”

He smiles that big goofy smile at me, he doesn’t say anything but a look of understanding shines through his warm brown eyes. We were both pretty hard on money when it came to extra things like eating out or going on a big date more than twice a week, but we understood each other’s circumstances.

“That’s why” James starts, cutting my thoughts short as I sip on my drink “I want you to move in with me”

I choke on my Pepsi at his words spitting a little bit onto the table, I sit back coughing and spluttering a bit trying to regain my composure. My heart aches when I look back up at James, a look of pure concern and terror painted across his face.

“I’m sorry it’s too soon” he says sheepishly taking a sip from his glass, leaning back to avoid contact

“No James” I say exasperatedly waving my hands in front of me to try and catch his attention “I just wasn’t expecting that” I say trying to read his features

“It’s okay if your say no” he says looking back at me tenderly

“And why would I say that” I ask him as I place my arm on the table reaching across for his hand “I’d love to move in with you asshole”

He laughs at my little nickname for him, reaching his hand across the table to fill the gap he intertwines our fingers

“Almost as awkward as the first time I met Eddie” we both laugh instantaneously at his comment

\--

“I cannot wait to meet your boyfriend” Eddie jokes from the divers side, I make a disapproving noise but laugh along with him

“You two will get along just fine” I say checking my phone for any new messages from James

“I can’t wait to tell him the story of when you spilt clam chowder on your dick” I cringe at the memory of it

“Don’t you dare” I say, turning my had to glare at Eddie “That is a memory repressed for a reason” he just laughs at me and continues to drive to the putt putt place

New message: James

 **James:** where are you I’m here already?

 **You:** we’re on third, be there in 10

“Was that your guy?” Eddie asks not bothering to look over at me

“Yeah” I say “He’s already there and impatient “

“I could have drove all of us” he states for the thousandth time this afternoon

The ride is quiet for the remaining time, I smile as we pull in with a disgruntled James stood beside the doors to the shop. He looks up from his phone and perks up when he sees Eddie and I pull into the parking lot

“About damn time!” he yells loud enough to be heard through the car, Eddie just laughs at him as he climbs out of the car

“Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed” I say as I get out, walking over to James I place a chaste kiss on his lips. He just grumbles and turns to face Eddie

“Don’t worry I’m not going to kiss you too” says Eddie extending out his hand, James hesitates not expecting this kind of confidence from someone he just met, I smile as they shake hands awkwardly and start to make their way into the building. I trail in behind them and stare up at the long board of prices above the counter

Conversation flowed easy between us all of us three, until we made it to the tenth hole

“I almost forgot!” Eddie exclaims loudly catching the attention of James and I “I get to tell the story of when Aleks got second degree burns on his dick!”

James stops in his tracks and looks over at me, eyes wide in curiosity and shock

“Do we really need to talk about that now?” I say distracting myself from the situation by playing the game

“I think James has the right to know” he says placing each end of the club in his hands “Right?” he asks looking over at James

“Yes” he answers demeanor shifting from frightened to complete curiosity

“Well” Eddie starts, I shy away not wanting to relive the painful experience “we were both working an evening sift, I was at the bar and Aleks was serving tables. I hear a bloodcurdling scream come from the kitchen that sounded a lot like Aleks so I drop what I’m doing and run back there”

“For context!” I but into the story “It was near the end of the night and I was training a new waitress that night”

“Anyways” Eddie says, starting up the story again “I bust into the back to see Aleks laying against the counter holding back swears with all his might, soup trailing down his torso into his pants, he trainee flailing about and everyone in the kitchen stopped in their tracks”

I look over to James, his jaw hung open staring intently at Eddie waiting for the story to continue. An unsettling silence fell over us, all waiting for the story to continue

“We wipe off the soup from his shirt and pants, by this time our manager comes in to see who was getting murdered. She lifted Aleks’ shirt to show the lobster red burns down his torso that led into his pants. She takes action at this point getting him a cold washcloth and sending him to the staff bathroom to clean up and she calms everyone down and gets them back to work”

“That soup” I say butting into the story once again “was on high sitting at the bottom of the burner all night and I was teaching Stephani how to get it out from the bottom, but she was a bit too enthusiastic and ended up pouring the whole ladle onto me instead of in the bowl”

“Push came to shove and I drove Aleks to the emergency room with an icepack down his pants” the story is concluded and I hide my head in my hands in shame.

“Wow” James says breaking the silence “that’s one hell of a story”

The rest of the night is spent laughing but no one had gotten over that horrible story

\--

I smile and thank our waitress as she sets our plates down in front of us

“My dick hurts just thinking about it” I mumble under my breath as soon as the waitress is out of earshot, James snorts with a spoonful of soup in his mouth as he tries his hardest to not spit it back into the bowl I slap his arm.

“Well there is no physical damage, we know that for sure” James says as I place my head in my hand to hide the blush spreading across my cheeks.

We eat in comfortable silence, lost in the moment. As we talk idly about our day I start to think about the first time I met one of James’ friends

“Do you remember that time we went to the bar?” I ask poking my pasta around its bowl

“Witch one?” he asks looking up from his meal

“Laser tag” I reply hoping that I could hint at the time without relaying what had happened

“Oh the time you told Jordan to go fuck himself because you thought he was hitting on you?” he asks trying to hide the laughter in his voice

“Yes” I say “that time, you also vomited all over my shoes”

“So it wasn’t a good night for either of us” he says dejectedly, he looks up at me and I laugh thinking back to the drunken apologies he gave me that night as we walked to his apartment. His smile beams back at me, I guess he remembered his side of the story too. He starts to laugh harder and I cock my head to the side trying to figure out what could be so funny, before I can ask he say

“The lake” followed by a burst of laughter from him and disapproving looks from the whole restaurant

\--

“James where the fuck are we?” I ask from the passenger side of his car, petting Ein on my lap as we travel down a dark dirt road. I wasn’t as concerned when James ad asked if I wanted to go for a ride and he brought towels, I just thought we were going to go at it in the backseat but when the dog came along my suspicions turned a different rout and I only got more confused when we turned off the highway and onto a dust side road.

“You’ll see soon enough” he says keeping his eyes glued to the road but letting a smile spread across his face. I huff and try not to be too mad at his vagueness, but the uncertainty of where we were driving to at ten o’clock at night started to get to me. My leg starts to bounce and Ein becomes restless on my lap licking my face and eventually climbing into the back seat to sleep, James pulls his right hand off the steering wheel and places it onto my knee halting its movement

“It’s safe where we are going” he says assuring me, I nod back trusting his judgment.

After a few minutes the car comes to a halt and I can feel my face drop with the sight in front of me

“Are you fucking serious?” I ask turning to look at James, he only nods back and starts to climb out of the car. I huff and follow after him dragging my feet across the gravely road, a wide shimmering lake reflects the moonlight in front of me and I let out a sigh. James is a sentimental asshole, his sentimental asshole.

“Get naked Aleksandr” James says holding Eins leash waking her to the front of the car

“We’re skinny dipping?” I ask wiping my face down with my hands

“Yeah” James says walking over to a tree to tie up his dog “Unless you want to go in with your clothes on”

He looks at me expectantly, nodding down trying to initiate the stripping

“Fine” I mumble lifting my shirt above my head, shrinking away from the chill of the night as it hits my bare skin. I look back up to see James has mirrored my actions and is reaching down to undo his belt, I follow his actions but stop at my boxers still unsure of the situation would play out

“Why’d you stop?” James asks, I glance back up at him to see him stark naked covering his junk with his hands. He pulls one away to gesture at my boxers, I comply and slip them off placing them onto my pile of clothes on the hood of the car. “Come on asshole” James says turning and walking towards the lake with Ein trailing after him dragging her leash.

I hesitate before slowly following up the rear, James turns to look back at me when he reaches the water’s edge shielding his eyes from the harsh lights coming from his cars headlights. I quicken my pace and end up beside him, the chilly water laps at our feet as James wraps his arms around my waist. I counter his actions by looping my arms around his neck leaning in for a soft kiss, James smiles against my lips and my stomach drops knowing exactly what he was trying to do. In a swift movement he tightens around my waist and lunges back into the water beside us, I gasp as the cold water engulfs my body sputtering water out of my mouth as I resurface. The lake was deep stopping us from hitting the bottom too abruptly, I stand up wiping the water off of my face.

“You asshole” I yell into the night, my eyes still closed and unsure of where James was. I hear his infectious laugh beside me and hands grab my hips pulling me back down to sit in the water.

“I knew you’d enjoy this” he says pulling me to straddle his lap, I comply and sit down facing him

‘I didn’t enjoy being flung into a freezing cold lake but naked” I say, he cuts off my complaints by kissing my cheek.

I laugh lightly as he snakes his arms around my torso planting his hands on my ass, I kiss him back initiating a heavy make out session between us both. My mind starts to race through all the possible ways this night could go

“Not yet” I mumble into James’ lips as I feel his finger brush past my entrance

“What do you mean?” He asks pulling back completely, dragging his hands up to rest on my hips. My heart jumps as I feel the sensation again

“A bug is trying to crawl UP my asshole dude!” I yell jumping up off of James’ lap to stand straight up in the water, arms flung above my head and heading straight to the shore

“Babe wait!” James yells after me trying to catch his breath through gasps of laughing fits, Ein starts to bark loudly off to the side of the car

“I’m done James!” I yell back at him grabbing one of the towels from the car and begin to dry myself off quickly getting dressed by the light of the car. By the time I get my boxers on James is out of the water and drying himself off beside me, I look down to see his dick still half erect despite the circumstance

“How do you still have a hard on” I say gesturing down

“Sorry” he mumble sadly with a smile still plastered across his face

“I want to go home”

\--

“That night could have gone worse” he says to me

“Or a whole lot better” I scoff rolling my eyes at the goofy grin plastered on his face

“Despite that” James says “Are you just about done I want to go to our home”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the last part about the lake is from a personal experience minus the other person, alone swimming in a grimy lake at 12pm (with a swim suit on) isn't safe kids don't do it. anyways I hope you liked the chapter, we're getting into the good bits now!


	6. Georgia

[Georgia](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l0XRlNZbQFE)

\---

I wake up to morning sunlight blinding me, the small sliver running through the blinds lands right across my eyes. I curl up tighter to James’ side to hide from the binding light, his heartbeat drums through my ears and I trace my hand across his clothed chest. He refused to go to bed without a shirt on, even after sex or in the heat of the summer.

The past month was spent stressfully packing up, moving out and unpacking my things into James’, our, apartment. I hadn’t realized how little I owned until it was all stashed away into cardboard boxes and piled into the small moving van we had rented for the trip over to the apartment. The first thing James did to welcome me into the apartment was place the bronze frame that used to rest on my nightstand onto his, he knew how much the photo of my family meant to me.

Not every day was as good as the first day I moved in, trying to put away my things into an unfamiliar place during the short breaks in-between classes and work proved to be difficult and stressful. James’ eyes were opened to how much of a starving college student I really was, eating the cheap 3 dollar staff meals from my work and skipping breakfast and lunch for a sandwich bag of dried children’s cereal during class. He woke up earlier than me just to make sure I ate before I left and brought home or made some sort of dinner even if that meant a bowl of ramen.

I tried to thank him every day for all that he does for me, I take Ein out because I know how worried he gets when he locks himself up in his office for hours drawing away and doesn’t hear her wine at his door, tiding up his work desk, cleaning the living room, doing the dishes or just straight up telling him how much he means to me.

I startle out of my thoughts as he lets out a sigh beside me, he tilts his head towards me and places a soft kiss onto my forehead

“Good morning” he mumbles, rubbing his hand across my back

“Morning” I reply curling my hand into a fist clutching his shirt, the realization that he has to leave the state soon hits me like a truck

“What’s with the attitude straight out of the gate?” he asks moving his other hand to be on top of mine, releasing the tension in my hand

“You leave today” I say muffled by the side of his shirt, hot tears sting in the corner of my eyes “Remember?”

“I’ll be gone for a week” he assures me, I’m still upset at the fact he’s going

“Why do you have to go to some stupid games convention in Seattle” I mumble “Just go to Denver comic con it’s the same thing”

“You know it’s not” he whispers into my hairline, I nod knowing that he’s right. It was a great opportunity to get his name out there into the business after working with a local game developer on moving hazard, they had already received endorsement from a local YouTube group and was having most of the trip there payed by his school.

“I just have to be bitter at every moment I can” I say earning a soft chuckle from James

“I know how I can make it up to you” he whispers gruffly into my ear causing me to gasp softly as his hand trails down to rub my thigh

\--

The drive to the airport is tense, both of us unsure about the next four days ahead of us and what was to come out of it. I drove this time and James sat beside me in the passenger seat, my eyes fixed on the road ahead and my right hand grips the gear shift tightly. I can see James out of the corner of my eye glancing at me from time to time, he places his hand on top of mine and I sigh letting the tension in my body dissipate

“It’ll be okay” he whispers, I’m not sure if it was for him or for me

“Yeah” I sigh back as I turn the car onto the ramp up into the car park

We get out of the car and make our way into the departure in silence, only breaking when it was time to say goodbye. We stand facing each other for a few seconds before he steps forward to bridge the gap between us hugging me tightly

“So this is goodbye” I whisper into his neck

“More like a see you later” he whispers

“Don’t quote an old spice commercial at a time like this” I hiss earning a laugh from him that I can feel vibrate through my chest

“You’re the one who’s being a drama queen” he jokes pulling back from the hug

“That’s Mr. Drama Queen to you” I say wiping my eyes avoiding eye contact with James, I hated goodbyes even if we would see each other later. I left my family back in Russia, moved to Missouri and left my parents and sister to come to Colorado to be greeted by nothing but a city of opportunities and no relationships. The move was anything but easy, it was hard keeping in touch with my family between my school and work schedule. Losing so many relationships and weakening those that were once so strong took a heavy toll on my mental and physical health, sure I still called my dad and texted my sister but it wasn’t the same as sitting down for a late lunch with them on a Sunday.

“No need to cry Hun” he says pulling my chin so I’m forced to look at him, dragging me out of my thoughts

“It’s just that last time I did this” I start choking on the words caught in my throat “I was getting on the plane, and it was the last time I saw my mum” she’d passed away almost exactly one year after I moved to Denver, student loans and tip wage didn’t leave me enough to travel back home. Being the stupid young self I was I didn’t take any of the money my sister had offered me to aid my visit back home, when I did it was too late to make it for anything but my mother’s funeral.

“I’m sorry” James says pulling me back into a hug as I begin to sob, using his shoulder as comfort I wrap my arms tightly around him “I didn’t mean to bring up those memories”

“It’s okay” I say composing myself pulling away from him, looking around at the prying eyes judging us

“But I really do have to go” he whispers to me, his hands on my shoulders fall move to my face to wipe away the tear streaks down my cheeks “I love you” he says tilting my head down to kiss my forehead

I freeze in my position as he walks down the hall into the security check, I look up just in time to see him disappear in line. I slowly make my way to the car buying a coffee on the way out the door, too late to go back to bed too early to function I think to myself as I sip on the hot drink slowly.

When I make it to the car I turn the ignition on and wait for the vehicle to warm up, letting myself cry.

\--

James: I miss you

You: I miss you too

James: I know it’s late there but do you want to talk

You: can we just text please?

I lock my phone after sending the message and lay back on our bed, not having James with me after the long day of lab work was just as bad as the fact I had no energy to talk with James

New message: James

James: that’s okay babe

James: tough day?

You: yeah

James: I wish I was there

James: I could make you dinner and we could sit and make fun of some bad movie on Netflix

You: don’t make me miss you more than I do :(

James: Sorry

I huff and stand up off the bed rubbing my face, I walk over our dresser and pull out a new pair of boxers. I hover over to one of James’ shirts debating whether or not to wear it, I decide against it and go to the closet pulling one of his sweaters off the hanger.

I change quickly and turn off the light, crawling into bed I curl into myself opening my phone. Ein whimpers at the foot of the bed I pat the covers beside me inviting her up to where James usually sleeps, she curls up in a ball with her head resting on her paws staring up at me. I slowly shut my eyes letting the stress of the week leave my body as I slowly fall asleep

 

\--

‘Fuck’ I mumble under my breath as I circle around the second floor of the airport parking garage, with no spots available I climb the ramp to the third level. I spot a space right away and drive up parking the car, stumbling out trying to get to arrivals as soon as possible, I’d misjudged the amount of traffic that would be on the road at 6am and his flight had left without any delays.

I run from the car straight into the building, dodging parked cars and pedestrians. The time without James wasn’t hard, it wasn’t fun but what really sucked was the last few minutes ticking down until he arrived. I burst through the automatic doors taking a moment to catch my breath anticipation wracking my body as I check the board or arrivals, I let out a sigh of relief when I read that James’ flight had landed safely. I walk slowly to the mat at the bottom of the long staircase leading into the baggage claim from the terminal very appropriately named the ‘hug rug’, I shift from foot to foot trying to channel my anxious energy into something besides the summer saults my stomach was doing.

Few minutes pass as my gaze passes from person to person but none of them James, I pull the phone out of my pocket checking for any new messages from James. I shoot a reply to Eddie and Seamus who had asked me how James was

“What a welcoming committee” my head snaps up to see James stood in front of me, dark bags hung under his eyes hair stuffed haphazardly into a beanie

“I swear to god I just pulled it out” I says stepping forward into his embrace, savoring the feeling I had lost for a week

“Sure you did” he mumbles into my hair, pulling me closer him

The car ride is slow, James telling me stories in a quiet worn out voice and I nod along listening intently up until we park beside our apartment complex.

We stumble up the stairs as I drag James’ suitcase behind us, making our way straight to the bedroom. He pushes open the door and heads straight to the bed collapsing onto it with a long sigh

“I missed you” he says rolling over to his side of the bed

“I missed you too” I say dropping his bag beside the dresser and flopping down onto the bed next to him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realize that I totally should have had him go to Georgia because, the title but it's too late now. I wrote smut for it but I didn't want to plague my okay writing with my terrible phone sex so that's going on the side story


	7. 5 am

"Aleks we need to get up now" James calls back to me, running a comb through the mess of curls on his head. It was already 1 pm on a Saturday, both of us had the day off besides my class at four that night, a rare chunk of time to be spent together.

 "No" I grumble back, hugging the pillow I was holding tighter to my chest. My body felt numb, head swimming with fog and a familiar terrible feeling. I hadn't felt this bad since first moving to Colorado, alone in an apartment hoping for the government to help with school costs and no social interactions besides classes and work. Confusion, fear, unsureness.

 "Babe" James pushes, walking over to the bed "Are you feeling alright?" he asks 

 'Why does he care so much for me?'

 "Yeah" I lie, my feelings are unjustified "Just really tired"

 "D'you want to stay home from tonight's class" he asks speaking softly, concern showing through his voice. His warm hand rubs my back slowly through the thin sheet covering me, the once comforting feeling now feels hollow causing my stomach to churn

 "It's okay" I say rolling onto my back to look up at him, forcing a smile onto my face. I don't want to make James worry, he's done nothing wrong, it's all me. He leans down to kiss me softly and stands back up to continue getting ready for his day, I get out of bed and make my way across the room to the shower. I barely notice as James calls after me asking what I was doing

 "Just going to go have a shower" I say glancing back at him, I shut the door behind me and turn on the fan. Once under the hot stream of water my mind seems to blur even further smearing my thought into an incoherent blur. 

 'Do I really love James?'

 I don't even notice when the water starts running cold down my back, I run off instinct lathering my body with soap and scrubbing. The noise of the bathroom door opening pulls me back into reality, I pull the curtain back slightly and stick my head out to see Ein sniffing around the floor, she blinks up at me with happy eyes but I go back to showering.

 "Sorry" James calls and I can hear him pick up the small dog shutting the door behind him

 

\---

 

"Are you sure?" James asks as we walk out of the front door of our shared apartment, Ein on her leash but still being carried by James

 "Yes" I say turning back round to shut the door behind us, James swore left and right that I should miss class today and stay in bed but I knew that was the last thing I should do. "I'm sure"

 He set down the dog as soon as we exited the building, letting her extend her leash as far as it would go in order to reach the line of trees on the edge of the parking lot. I stuff my hands in my pockets to protect them from the nippy air, James does the same trying to force the handle of the leash into his jacket pocket. We walk in awkward silence down the busy street as Ein leads the way dodging from one side on the sidewalk to the other, eventually making it to our destination.

 "Do you want me to go in?" I ask breaking the silence, James nods and I walk up to the front doors of the convenience store.

 I nod at the man behind the counter as he greets me, I walk straight to the back of the store where their coffee machines line the wall. Two creams one sugar in a French roast medium for James, three sugars large dark roast for me. I cap the cups and place two sleeves around them, to dull the heat of holding the drinks, I ignore the guy places himself to my side grabbing a cup from its rack.

 "Aleks?" I hear him say, I turn my head and look at the man talking to me. He's not very tall, his hair reaches to his shoulders and a bright goofy smile is plastered across his face. Never seen him before 

 "Yeah" I say hesitantly, wracking my brain to try and remember if I knew who he was

 "It's Joe" he says, must've seen the confusion on my face. I plaster a large smile on my face and nod, turning back towards the counter to pay letting my face drop. I place the cups on the counter and reach back to pull my wallet out, my attention is caught when I see a third cup being placed beside mine. I follow the hand up the arm to see the Joe guy from a few seconds ago still smiling at me, pulling a bill out of his wallet and handing it to the guy behind the counter.

 "It's on me" he says smiling up at me as he receives his change. I grab my cups off the counter and say a quiet thank you, I start to walk out of the store and he follows close beside.

 "Hey!" I hear James call from the side of the store, Ein sniffing the ground around his feet "Haven't seen you in a while Joe" he continues gaining my attention 

 "James, what's up?" Joe says from beside me, they know each other? 

 "I see you've met Aleks" he says motioning to me with his open hand, I nod as Joe looks over to me

 "I have" he says not mentioning the awkward encounter in the store "Met him through Spencer, they have a class together"

 It clicks in my brain then, this is the Joe that spencer is dating! I can feel my face flush red with embarrassment, casting my gaze to the ground as I step next to James handing him his drink.

 "You had no idea who he was did you?" James asks leaning in to whisper in my ear as Joe kneels to pet Ein. I nod yes and lift my drink to my lips, cringing at the overbearing heat filling my mouth.

 Joe parts ways with us and he goes back to his car bidding us farewell, we walk back to the apartment slowly. Taking the long way back so Ein can get her proper exercise for the day

 "Feeling any better?" James asks as he dries Eins paws off with the towel placed on the shoe rack, I kick off my shoes placing them onto the rubber mat under the rack. I shrug pulling off my jacket, James mouth straightens into a thin line and he stands up beside me letting the dog run into the apartment.

 "Hey" he says placing his hands on my waist, pulling me close to face him "I'm worried about you"

 I lean in and pace my head on his shoulder 

 "I feel so numb James" I whisper into his sweater 

 He falters for a second, a second of hesitation, but he leans in to kiss the side of my face. He knows about this, I've told him so many times describing how it felt, but he never had to deal with it himself.

 'Do I just like the attention he gives me?'

 "You're staying home from class" he says running his hands up and down my back, a cold caress that holds no emotion to me.

 I break, sobbing loudly into his sweater

 He continues to rub my back slowly, leading me to our bedroom unknowing of what to do with me. He lays me on the bed gently, letting my head lay on my pillow as if not to break me. He pulls me close letting me continue, he runs his hands through my hair, down my side, up my neck, a feverish attempt to make me stop.

 I know he's scared, I am too, he's never seen me like this. In the months I've known him I've his this violent emotion of mine.

 I control my sobbing, slowing it down until all that's left is heavy breathing. I look up at him with fear in my eyes, he looks down with hope.

 I kiss him, needing to feel that passion from him. He kisses back, anything to stop me from breaking down again.

 I move fast, taking all the steps I would if this were any other sexual encounter with James. 

 Hand up the thigh, across the stomach, rest on the hip. Move down slowly to his dick, rub over his jeans until he wines my name.

 "Aleks" he gasps as I run my hand down his clothed crotch one more time.

 On que he takes control, rolling over on top of me. Kissing down my neck, I lift my head to the side giving him more access.

 My body responds in the way it should, breathe quickening, heart racing, and penis hardening.

 I snap out of my checklist when James' face is at my crotch, pulling the waist band of my sweatpants down. 

 'Enjoy yourself, you're overthinking it' I tell myself

 I gasp when James takes the head of my cock in his mouth, he continues down taking more of me in. he goes until I tell him to stop, I'm too close to release.

 We continue the routine, he gets up to remove the rest of his clothing and I follow his actions leaving myself stark naked.

 He preps me with a generous amount of lube, being sure to not hurt me. Tenderly easing me open as I pant at such an intimate touch, clutching the bedsheet beside my body.

 "I'm ready" I tell him when I know I'm okay to take his cock. I sit up against his protests, pulling myself onto my knees to match his posture. I wrap my arms around him, relishing in the heat between our bodies in contrast to the cold dark room.

 I grind up, making sure to connect our members, rubbing at a tantalizingly slow pace. 

 "Fuck Aleks" he moans, applying pressure against me to watch my pace. 

 He lowers me down slowly to take the control again, placing me in the same position as before, on my back with my knees bent back.

 "God your beautiful" he whispers in my ear, I moan at his words as he enters me. 

 He starts off slow, like always, letting out soft moans with each thrust.

 "Ah!" I gasp as he hits my prostate, a pleasurable heat surging through my body straight to my dick

 We continue like this for a few minutes, not bothering to change positions, just keeping a steady rhythm is enough.

 "Oh god Aleks" James moans into my ear, kissing down my neck once again he reaches down to stroke my dick.

 I choke out a moan at the new sensation, so close to a sweet release. James speeds up his pace, slamming into me, hard.

 "Ah fuck" I moan, orgasm building in me quickly "James I-"

 I'm driven speechless, the moans escaping my mouth jolted by motion. I yell as my orgasm jolts through me, tensing my body making me arch my back father than I thought it could go.

 My mind is a blur as I come down from my high, if James finished or not I don't know. The flash flood of emotions wash over me again. Guilt. Confusion. Fear.

 "Aleks" James says catching my attention "How are you doing baby?" he asks, he's running a damp cloth across my chest soothingly

 "Yeah" I say blandly, when did he get the cloth?

 "You were zoned out for a bit" he says, tenderly wiping the cum off of my body "I was worried"

 I just nod, letting him take care of me. He stops after a little while, tossing the dirty cloth into the laundry hamper across the room. He lays down beside me, letting his hand lightly brush mine, I reach out for his hand and clasp it tightly.

 'Why does he love me?'

 "Can we have a nap?" I ask quietly, speaking up to the roof

 "Of course" he says, we move under the covers and situate our selves 

 James wraps his arms around me carefully, pulling me into the little spoon position. We lay in the dark just breathing slowly, waiting for sleep to take over our bodies. I'm tired but sleep isn't coming to me, my body aches from the pounding it just took. James' breath tickles the back of my neck, his thumb lazily rubbing up and down my hip.

 "I love you" he whispers into my ear, causing me to shutter.

 The cherry red numbers from the nightstand clock burn into my eyes as the shapes blur out, I try my best to control my breathing but James catches on.

 'Do I love him back?'

 He starts to move his hand down my leg and up my side, back and forth. My breathing slows down again as exhaustion wracks my body, puling me into a restless sleep

 I wake up to James snoring lightly beside me, glancing up at the clock tells me that I slept though my class into the night, 4:34am. My stomach aches and gurgles within me, after shock of all my emotions plague me with the inability to sleep and a plethora of aches in my body. I carefully pull James' arm off of me and place it at his side, I stand carefully as to not disturb James. I walk to the dresser slowly placing my hands onto its surface, I lean down on them staring at my face in the mirror

 'Is this really what I want?' I ask myself quietly into the room, leaning back

 I walk back to the bed, sitting down on my side carefully. I glace back up at the clock 5am. I have work in three hours, only one more to sleep.

 "Aleks" James whispers behind me, I turn around wide eyed not knowing how long he's been awake "What are you doing?" he asks

 "I uh" I say, not knowing how to answer 

 "What's on your mind?" he asks shifting the question

 "Is this what I want from life" I state blandly, looking James right in the eyes 

 "What do you mean?"

 "Where is my life going? Do I really want to be here?" James' eyes widen with shock at my words.

 I'm being blunt, a bunt object hurts more than a dull one, hitting more of the surface with each blow bruising the skin.

 "Like" he starts, worry in his voice "With me?"

 "I don't know James" I say truthfully "I don't know if I'm worth it, if I love you"

 Time freezes as the words leave my mouth, I instantly regret the words as a look of sadness washes over James features. He doesn't speak, just lays back down facing away from me.

The last blunt blow hit him swiftly in the chest, instead of bruising the surface it shattered what was underneath. Splinters of ribs stab into the heart, causing pain in movement and thought.

**Author's Note:**

> well here's the first chapter out of 12 (Hopefully) I'm still unsure of the exact direction of the fic but the chapters practically write themselves because I have so many damn ideas, a lot of filler stuff with Aleks messing around in the first three chapters but after that it becomes more relationship focused. each chapter is loosely based on a song (The title of the chapter) and once I have all the songs set in stone I will make a playlist for it. thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it and continue to read it!


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